Monday, August 21, 2017

View from the Moon, and Short People CAN Walk!

Hi, Sillies,
How are you?
Please be well and in good spirits. Thank you.

I was imagining a view from the moon (or worse, the sun) today -- hundreds of thousands of school kids, adults, anyone who likes a good show, all staring up at it to catch a glimpse of the total eclipse. Could this country's people look sillier? Oops, we probably have and could.
Or maybe not!
I copied this in "Sunscreen" filter for your retinal protection. 
Regardless, I don't recommend staring directly at it for any length of time. 

Speaking of silly, someone said the most silly and bizarre thing to me yesterday. I was at a picnic, and a friend's much older relative said "It's strange to see such a short person walking around like that". Really? I've had nearly 50 years of practice at it! Yeah, they let us short ones roam around on weekends. They even loosen the wardrobe restrictions. We can expose nips and kneecaps on casual Fridays. Ha! They assume mine are in proportion to my size. Wait til they see these girls!

 "What does being small have to do with walking around? I'm perfectly mobile."

"Oh don't mind me. I'm an old lady, my brain is foggy. I meant that you're cute as the devil." Great! Who doesn't want to be as adorable as the devil? I've only danced with him briefly. When he and I get together, it's for a quickie at best. I have to close my eyes too. 
Then, at the same time, she and I said "The devil isn't cute."

Flustered --she had no more feet to put in her mouth-- the old lady went for Strike 3. "Well I meant that you're cute as a button." Where does that phrase come from? Nobody seems to know for sure. It's thought that because buttons are small, they are cute. That's stupid. If you need a microscope to find it, there's nothing "cute" about the mission.  Give me something I can work with, for a change.
At this point, I quickly moved away. I wouldn't tolerate witnessing her take another turn at bat. 

Later, I told my friend what his relative had said to me. We laughed about it, and he claimed to have no idea who she is. I can't blame him - such a tall person walking around like that. It's a strange thing.

Have a good evening and week, my friends. 

Monday, August 14, 2017

Words ~ A Poem

Dear Sillies,

I'm always thinking of you. Though I wrote this for a friend who's not well enough to utilize the social media, I know that a lot of you (and your loved ones) are battling conditions over which you have little or no control. That said, I hope this poem provides spiritual warmth and comfort. It's my intent, though words are so limiting. And that's kinda the point of my poem.

Also, this is the first (non-erotic) poem I've written in years. Naughty rhyme is much easier for me. 

Anyway, take gentle care of yourselves.
                                             dried roses, my coffee table centerpiece

With wholehearted sincerity:

If words were verbs, this verse would serve

To spin plight into light like you deserve.

To trade the pains and strife you bear

With regained faith in life that’s fair

Erase all portions of your toll

Embrace and restore your gracious soul.

If words could expel your gravest fears

They’d repel what plagues you

And those you hold dear.

Inject youthful zest and the same flashing spark

That helped move you through

Past patches of dark.

They’d kill the ills and cease the disease.

Fill you with seamless steam, thrill, and ease.

If words could convey your out-of-sight worth

They’d bathe you in every last diamond on earth.

Words: they can blast, pop, and pound

And yet not make a sound.

They can crowd real loud

When there’s no one around.

Yet in times of travail

When hours require fight

Words, flail, fail, and 
duck out of sight.

They can’t serve as elixirs

Or tenderize the gruff

But they’ll render an

“I love you.”

I wish that was enough.

Robyn Alana Engel 8.17

Monday, August 7, 2017

Pat Hatt and the Cat, parental guidance suggested

Dearest Sillies,
What can I say? Pat Hatt gave my secrets away.
Here's part of his rhyme about me, posted Sunday at his sea.
In non-highlighted font you will find, my comments in kind (well, actually, naughty, not so kind).

I'm assuming you're all following Pat Hatt.
He's phenomenal, weird, quirky, over-the-top creative, and very generous. He'll put you in the spotlight when you least expect it. Thank you, Pat!

Be well, my friends.

Robyn likes large.
Slim won't work.
Neither will quick discharge.
Large and long is a perk.
I won't lie or fake it.
What you say is true.
If it's too stubby or slender
I say: "We didn't start, but we're through."
I mean, shrinkage can't be the excuse every time
When I need binoculars to see it
A banana works fine.
Wow, went there.
Odds are I would.
We've got verses to spare.
Were those odds understood?
 Your naughtiness rivals 
my scandalous ways
We're both odd, so the odds were 
we'd confuse all for days.
That could be the why.
Why no new posts fly.
She's off under the sky,
With some new guy.
 Truth about why, no new posts fly:
There have been teasers, but no dates and no pleasers.
One hot chocolate man 
did make me beam
After I read my erotica (at Open Mic) - like a dream.
He bought me a drink, got my hopes up and then
stepped out for a phone-call
I'd ne'er seen him again.
Then there was one
with whom I shared a quick kiss and some fun
Later when I reached out to chat
he had to . . . sell baseball cards on EBay. Well, how 'bout that?
Alas, last week, I had finally met
someone decent and nice
I was ready to bet
There was a good vibe
and a two hour phone-call
He said he'd come up with plans.
I figured we'd have a ball.
Yeah, that didn't happen at all. (He didn't even call.)
So you see, this is why
no new posts fly.
I haven't been dating,
not even a smidge.  
Good thing I have friends
and bananas in the fridge.

Monday, July 31, 2017

Summer Camp Fun, Sh'mucks (Repost)

Striving for coolness

My Dear Sillies,
Please forgive my periodic re-posts. I figure that having blogged for 8 years, I've earned the rights. Some of you are so loyal (e.g., Alex), you've seen this before. But it's been 6 years and didn't get many views. So I'm re-posting a snippet from a fun (and exhausting) summer camp experience.
   They comprise a stigmatized yet ever-increasing segment of our population. Nothing but a twist of genetic fate brings on a developmental disability. (Though we are inundated with concepts about the causes of autism, none of these hypotheses has been proven.) There is no known cure, and symptoms last a lifetime.
   Fortunately, some laws and systems address this groups’ special needs. For one, Ronald McDonald Charities offers camp experiences wherein kids and adults with developmental delays can be themselves and have a great time.
   Fortunately, the campers offered at least as much laughter as they posed challenges. I was fueled by their uninhibited randomness and spunk. (Sporadic doses of hot chocolate helped too.)
Here are 10 HIGHLIGHTS from the session. [Names have been changed to protect their identities.]
1)  When we first met, camper Traci sized me up (literally). “Wow, you’re short. But I don’t mean to make assumptions.”
2) In the middle of outdoor activity time, Jimmy casually dropped onto the grass at my feet for meaningful dialogue:
“Ekxy6tynmypsi, how 'bout you?” he asked.
“Oh yes, how about you?” I replied.  
This exchange repeated itself approximately 23 times.
3) While walking to Eagle Lake, Karl ranted about “sh’mucks, sh’mucks, sh’mucks!” I was tempted to commiserate via explicit detail regarding all the sh’mucks I’ve encountered in this lifetime, but – as a chipmunk crossed our path- I astutely realized he was likely referencing those little critters. Phew. Good thing I maintained a professional stance.
4) At the lake, I laid Annie’s towel across a beach chair, adjusted the chair, and told her to try it out. She stretched out on it.
“How does that feel, Annie?”
“It feels like a million bucks!”
5)  “Okay ladies, let’s drink some water before we leave for arts and crafts,” I suggested.
“Yeah,” Carrie quickly agreed. "If you don’t drink enough water, you’ll get hibernated."
6)   As Helen dashed out of the cabin to join the group, she bounced with a mixture of cheer and hypochondria. “I need to go to the nurse! I just popped my knee!”
7) In all of her glorious drama, Traci asserted, “Girls can be so dramatic sometimes!”
      8) Readying herself to take some pictures of the, cabin group, Becca concentrated on highly scientific calculations: “I’ll take half of the group in one shot and then the other half in another picture. Half plus half equals two and a half.”

 9)  Traci advised the group on Justin and Selena:
“Justin Bieber is 17 and he’s dating Selena Gomez. She’s 18. That’s very bad. They are setting a bad example of teenage dating.”
10)   On the last morning, with sadness pervading the campsite, Becca hung onto me for minutes with a silently somber hug. Suddenly, she blasted my eardrum, shouting “Red Robin!”

Kudos to the campers and their families for facing life with gumption, love and cheer!  They're an inspiration! (I'm glad to see Camp Ronald McDonald is still going strong these days.)

Take good care of yourselves.
Love, smiles, & coolness or heat (whatever's most needed) to you.

Monday, July 24, 2017

Frozen Hot Chocolate & Spedden

Dear Silly Friends,
How are you? I hope you're managing life's challenges with your usual tenacity.
It's hard for me to imagine that the whole world isn't sweltering now - we've been facing weather in the 100s (Fahrenheit) for seemingly 89 straight weeks. Probably more like 5-6. Regardless, for you and me, I needed to do another taste test.
This time, I sampled Enlightened's FROZEN HOT COCOA.

   Pretty impressive label, right? Super high in fiber, low in sugar, fat...And only 90 cals per "serving," which means when you eat the whole thing (one real serving), it's only 360 calories.
   How'd it taste? Well, it did disappear quickly, but it was too marshmallow-y. I love marshmallows, just not when they take precedence over chocolate and replace any semblance of chocolate. Plus, dare I say? It was actually a bit too sweet for my sugar tooth. I can't recommend this one. I'll give it a 5 on a 1-10 scale of chocolate goodness. BTW, does anyone know what Erythritol is? I just noticed it on the label.
   Now, as a reminder of how wonderful Blogland is and can be . . .
   When I found an old family photo recently, I realized that I'd been misspelling my Mom's hometown. That's why I couldn't find any indication that "Speden" still exists. But, add another "d," and it's cited in Wikipedia as a hamlet (very tiny town) in Alberta, Canada.  How exciting! Yet I'm thousands of miles away and may never see it with my own eyes.
   So I messaged Debra* (She Who Seeks), who lives in Alberta, to find out if she'd seen Spedden.  She hadn't been there, and it's a few hours away. But Debra said she'd gladly make the trek on my behalf to do some sleuthing and picture taking.
   Not only do I now have photographs of my Mom's home-town, Debra went well beyond this to embark on more research. She located and sent me a 10-12 page booklet that talks about my Grandpa Isaac and my cousins' family - the original pioneers of Spedden. Thanks to her efforts, I've learned specific details about my family, my identity. (I'd never met either Grandpa - they died far too young. My siblings and I have very few pictures of our parents' earlier days. It's priceless to have this memorabilia.)
   Thank you, Debra! You're stellar! *If you don't follow Debra, you need to. Her blog is packed with fun and meaningful gems.
    We're lucky to have this little slice of cyberspace utopia, aren't we?

Class of 1948-49, Spedden, Alberta, CANADA      ^Mom, Edith Stern, middle gal, front row

Keep a smile.
May you find treasures to appreciate daily.
Love to you, my Sillies.

Tuesday, July 18, 2017

My Date with Bernie Sanders

My Dear Sillies,
I hope this finds you well.
Thanks to a generous friend, who set me up with my dream man, I had a date last week...
Here we are, me and Bernie Sanders (Action Figure) pressing up against my chin flab - we'll call it some form of necking. Yet Bernie was a perfect gentleman.

He didn't drink, couldn't reach the straw.
Below: If anyone knows how to manage a lemon, it's my Bernie.
And the highlight of the evening: Bernie picked up the check. Such a gentleman, my Bernie!

Bernie Sanders, my (and his wife's and some of the world's, but most importantly my) love, still fighting the good fight. #ForeverBernieSanders #Resisttheorangemofo

Tuesday, July 11, 2017

Comment Collage Starring You!

Dear Sillies,
You're the silliest, and that's why I love you.
I got many laughs from re-reading and mixing up some of your recent comments. Apologies if you're not quoted. I couldn't fit them all in.
Please be well, take care of yourselves, and stay safe.

Birgit said people (the sound not the spelling and not sure if it is a German dialect), in German, means penis!  
Anthony J. Langford said I’ll be sure to unfurl the curl, unleash the beast, let loose Ma Bruce, unchain Mr Pain, back in a jiffy with Mr Stiffy. 
 Geo. said My compliments and admiration. 
 Alex J. Cavanaugh said Hope there is a triple-chocolate cake waiting for you.  
Pat Tillett said Betsy Ross as porn star? Who would've thunk it... Gina Gao said This is so hilarious.
A Beer For The Shower said It's like that person who breaks up with you and then has to passive-aggressively say on the way out, "You're ugly and I didn't like you, anyway." Crystal Collier said What a meanie head. L. Diane Wolfe said Just be sure to put that Hancock back in its proper quill.  
klahanie said Having read this, I might just have a celebration weiner.  
Gorilla Bananas said I'm going to re-read the Declaration of Independence to check whether that's really a fundamental liberty! 
 Pat Hatt said I think one may get arrested if they parade it.
Stephen Hayes said Ha! I'm enjoying this after hanging my flag from our balcony. Elephant's Child said No points for me. I am clueless about movies.
Joanne said Ran the flag up the pole / Playing music loud with soul / In theory we are free / From a king of tyranny?
Jono said I'll run it up the pole and see who salutes it.  
Susan Flett Swiderski said Happiness always looks beautiful.  
Pat Hatt said But don't neglect to inspect before the right one you select.  
Janie Junebug said Wave your flag high and proud.
Debra She Who Seeks said Old Glory, raise it high! Long may it wave!
Lux G. said That story deserves a standing ovation.